OSCAR STORIES- RUSSELL CROWE (EXCLUSIVE)

Our rep strolls up his friend, Dawn.They are both backstage of Dolby Theatre ,at the Academy Awards. Dawn is giddy and claims that Liam Neeson just passed by her,going into a realistic grass maze- that escaped the climax of The Shinning.

The two friends talk about how cool, that old action star still is, for 10 minutes. They discuss how awesome the Taken movies were, How he "trained" Batman and his semi-godly turn in Clash of the Titans.

The American Gangster star appears and our rep seems to be confused,not seeing the first Darkman.Crowe stuns them both by revealing...

Russell Crowe: I am NOT Liam Neeson.I'm Russell Crowe. I heard every thing you guys said- behind that maze there.

The two shocked, by the celebrity eavesdropper's statement.They are silent, wondering what to say to the acting Gladiator.

RC: You know, From A Beautiful Mind.

Our rep agrees with a knowing head nod.Dawn continues with her confusion,as she's never seen that film.

Crowe just smiles,looks at his expensive watch and said....

RC: Well, back to the salt mines.

Our rep, gets just enough courage to make a lame joke. He wished "Mr Crowe" to "Have a G'Day!"

The actor stops at the door,to mumble something...Assholish and continues to the main stage.

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Principle filming started on Transformers this week, based on the wildly popular 80's toys and animated series of the same name. It also, like the Ninja Turtles-is the show that won't die. 

The star- Las Vegas pretty boy Josh Duhamel was present on the set, and acting at times like a loud mouth fool (and embarrassing Jimmy Caan in this reporter's opinion.) Anyway, director Michael Bay (fresh off his failure with Scarlet Johansson on the Island) is truly back in his element of blowing crap up real well. One can hear, the sounds of townspeople running, as the story's villains, the Decepticons with sadist glee, destroy product placement encased buildings.

The lead evil doer, a huge tank leads the opening salvo, by blasting a men's pants store and crushing the same three cars (in two takes,) putting Bay back in the zone.

As the tall, lanky mastermind with graying, brown hair- took a tiny sip of rationed water, then hopped into his black Ford Explorer to do some quick rewriting. He followed that by, power eating some soup in the car. Then, in the next set of explosions littered the New York style cityscape- in dry manure.