Around Winter 2006, I was doing security work at Universal Studios, Hollywood. I was on traffic duty ,on the Wisteria Lane town set. I was positioned at the mouth of the famous cut-de-sac of houses, just above the Jaws exhibit. It was sunset, it was near lunch time (Hollywood time,) when Desperate Housewives Executive Producer- Marc Cheery (the living definition of a pig) drove up in golf cart,with fighting beauties Teri Hatcher and Nicolette Sheridan.Hatcher was lovely in a black cocktail dress and Nicolette was a form-fitting white dress. Cherry was slovenly dressed, in a dress shirt and slacks.
Cherry looked right me and said "Look, I have to get up to Wisteria Lane for a function." There was a network thrown party on the street, to reflect the suburban atmosphere of the hit soap, in between filming.
I told him, "Sorry, they are in the middle of a take." In fact, only now did Cherry- see all the cars held back in both directions. Then, he told me he's "a busy man" and "he needed to get up the set." I told 'em "when they release the traffic, sir." Normally, this would take a minute or two. The ladies looked bored, and Nicolette started to say something snide, when Cherry shot her a glaze- that quickly silenced her.
About five minutes later, Cherry started in again on "how important I am to this network,THIS studio and could I...just go" (and ruin a take on his own show.) I told him "NO, sir" again, with quiet forcefulness. Cheery looked agitated.
Then, the best Lois Lane ever, eased toward me -with her fine bosoms- barely encased, in her lovely dress. She stated coolly, "Please, we're already late and I'd really appreciate it, if you helped us." I stare into the trusting face and boobs of Susan Meyer. I then, grab my walkie-talkie and told my boss, "I have the Producer of Desperate Housewives here..."
"Executive Producer!," said Cherry.
I restart my message for Teri, "I have the Executive Producer of Desperate Housewives (Cheery nods approvingly) and Teri Hatcher here. They need to need to get up to Wisteria Lane, for a Network party. I need permission- to release their cart, right now."
About a whole minute passed, when I hear, "OK, let em through." Teri smiles and mouths me, a near silent "Thank You." Cheery without another word, powers up the golf cart and zooms away. At the back of the cart, Sheridan and I share a glance. She has an almost look of "Save Me", with worry and doubt etched on her pretty face. The cart turns onto Wisteria Lane and quickly out of my sight.
About a month later, I just happening to be watching Desperate Housewives at home- when a strange scene started on the show. Teri Hatcher in a similar dress, tried to charm a black security guard (dress in a decent suit, instead the fake police outfit I wore) into letting her into a outdoor party.
The main differences here: the guard is quite gruff to her, which I guess is what Cheery though I was to him. When Hatcher tried to get pass the guard by touching his chest, the TV guard drops her... onto the hood of a car (breasts first)- in zip-tie hand cuffs and reports her to the police, for trespassing.
Cherry again pissed- at the celebrity Chopped Champion- for succeeding with a black man, where a corpulent, loudmouth failed. Remember, it took President Obama and Former Majority whip Nancy Pelosi, to approve Obama Care...together- in a harsh, lying world.
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