JERRY SEINFELD HATES THE DRAKE AND DEATH. PLUS, "NICE" BORAT NEWS.

EVA MENDES IS BACK FROM REHAB AND BEYONCE IS MARRING THE UGLY RAPPER GUY.

HAYDEN PANETTIERE GETS HUMANITARIAN AWARD AND MADONNA SPEAKS OUT ON GREEN ISSUES.

VICTORIA'S SECRET SWIMSUIT EDITION!!

LETTERMAN TO POUNCE ON LENO'S GAY BAITING JOKES TO RYAN PHILLIPPE.

"In talking about Ryan's first role, I realize that what I said came
out wrong," said top late-night talk show host Jay Leno, after a series of gay jokes about recently divorced, Ryan Phillippe's first acting gig as "the first gay teen on a Soap Opera."

Leno continues: "I certainly didn't mean any malice. I agree it was a dumb
thing to say, and I apologize."

Seven days ago, Leno dared the Gosford Park thespian- to give the camera "his gayest look" as the man ripped from Reese Witherspoon's loins stated- "Wow, That is so something I don't want to do." When Leno continued, the Cruel Intentions star threatened to bolt the show on the air, if he continued.

The gay advocacy group GLADD took NBC's #1 host to task. GLAAD President Neil G. Giuliano proclaimed ,"Under the guise of comedy, the talk-show host is demonstrating a lack of respect for the gay community and insensitivity to both his
co-workers and the audience, to whom he owes an apology." "We are proud of Ryan for refusing to participate in Leno's thoughtless attempt at humor,"

NATASHA HENSTRIDGE MENTIONS KID ROCK IN PASSING.

21 LUCKY ENOUGH TO CRUSH WHO- AT THE BOX OFFICE

JESSICA SIMPSON ILL AND PATRICK DEMPSEY TO FRONT FOR...AVON?

LINDSAY LOHAN TO REBUILD CAREER IN MANSON'S GIRLS.

MILEY CYRUS OWNS NICK'S KIDS CHOICE AWARDS.

LADY BOXER/GLADIATORS CO-HOST READY TO CONCEIVE AND PETER "BANNING" PAN DIVORCES.

KEVIN SPACEY GOES FOR 21, WITH PROTEGE KATE BOSWORTH.

BRITNEY SAVES LILY ON CBS AND BRANGELINA SUPPORTS CLINTON/OBAMA IN NUMEROUS WAYS.

ROBERT DE NIRO OPENS NEW VEGAS HOT SPOT AND BRITNEY LOSES TO HER FATHER AGAIN- IN COURT.

THAT LEATHER-HEAD BEAUTY, RENEE ZELLWEGER TALKS...

BEN AFFLECK REAR ENDS #1 FAN ,WHILE FILMING MOVIE IN WASHINGTON.
Source:Reliable Source-CNN

State of Play's Ben Affleck, was in D.C. working with Russell Crowe and Rachel
McAdams. A Kate House, caused an auto accident with the movie Daredevil, that became the thrill of her life.

Her Honda Accord hit the back of his FBI-colored SUV- after her doctor's appointment. The movie pin-up boy- lead the Average Jane to his place....so they could exchange auto info. House happily screamed "It was Ben Afflek!," after the star helped her out of her car.

He then asked her, had she "been reading about (his new movie)" when she tearfully demanded, to know why so had the good fortune to talk with him. She then stated that "I had just seen 'Gone Baby Gone,' and I told him how much I loved
that."

Affleck retorted "Take care of yourself, and take care of that car. Don't cry anymore, it's all right."
House declared- this is the best of her celebrity encounters to CNN. Why? Well those David Spade like stars (Back in Los Angeles,) were "usually pretty obnoxious," but proclaimed Mr. Jennifer Garner "was so, so sweet."

PARIS HILTON PARTIES IN SOUTH AFRICA: AFRICANS ALLOWED TO ATTEND.

ANGELA BASSETT GET STAR ON HOLLYWOOD'S WALK OF FAME AND FERGIE AINT PREGGERS

IF YOU HATE HANNAH MONTANA,CHECKOUT THE JONAS BROTHERS BAND.

POLICE HASSLE MEL GIBSON ABOUT SUICIDE AT ONE OF HIS PLACES.

HEATH LEDGER'S FAMILY, FINALLY READY TO FIGHT OVER HIS FORTUNE.

ALYSSA MILANO,SETH GREEN,HALO, AND SUMMER GLAU ALL HIT COMIC CONVENTION.

PUFFY OVEREATS.

WILL SMITH IS A CHRISTIAN AND GUY RICHIE IS LOOKING TO DIVORCE MADDONA.

CANTERBURY'S LAW'S KEITH ROBINSON.

HALLE BERRY IS A BEAUTIFUL MOM AND THE COMMIES LOVES AMERICAN BASEBALL

SARAH SILVERMAN STARTS F&^*ING JAMES KIMMEL AGAIN, AT AN ART SHOW.

THE CW GOES RETRO WITH 90210 FOLLOW-UP.

SABRINA MAKES A MORTAL AND DAN RADCLIFFE WILL BE IN GRADUATE SCHOOL- WHEN THE HARRY POTTER SERIES FINISHES!

BRITNEY MEETS LILY ON YOUR MOTHER.

LILO TURNS BODY ART INTO COFFEE TABLE BOOK/EXHIBIT.

JIM CARRAY FINALLY GETS WORK- FOR ARROGANT SLUT GIRLFRIEND JENNY MCCARTHY, AT HORTON...PREMIERE.

KRISTEN KREUK WILL BE CHUN-LI NOW, IN LONG AWAITED SEQUEL TO STREET FIGHTER MOVIE.

The lovely Smallville titan, will attempt to fill out the early years of slutty, but stylish marital arts mistress. How she first got involved with semi-legal prize fighting and how that turned her into the cartwheel kicking, Connie Chung type-that has graced the game series every since.

Rumors persist that X-Men: United vixen Kelly Hu was the original choice, but had to drop out to complete work on two independent movies,62 Pick Up and The Tournament.

Also, Micheal Clarke Duncan (The Green Mile Oscar winner and Daredevil kingpin) will be The Mike Tyson-ish boxer Balrog. Will he be friend or foe? One of the male members of the Black eyed peas is negotiating to play a lesser,violent part in the flick.

JUDGE ORDERS BRITNEY SPEARS TO SURVIVE ON $1500 A WEEK..ON A DEBIT CARD!!

HAYDEN PANETTIERE LOVES MTV'S AMERICAN DANCE CREW

HOW TO AVOID ENDING UP LIKE BRITNEY, K-FED AND NICOLE (LOVE WISE.)

JASON BOURNE TO HAVE A KID-TO COVER HIS IDENTITY AS A NEW DAD

FAMILY GUY'S CLEVELAND (A BLACK DUDE) TO GET HIS OWN SPIN-OFF! IS AMERICAN DAD DONE FOR?

ASHLEY SIMPSON DRUNK, AROUND SKUNK FRIENDS OF HERS AND IDOL B.S.!

BLACK UNITY ACHIEVED: LUDACRIS, ASHANTI AND KANYE WEST COLLABORATE ON NEW CD!

LEA THOMPSON KNOWS THE SECRET OF LESBIANS, ER...SOCCER MOMS.

DIRTY DANCER GETS CANCER AND BAI LING WAS ROBBED, IN COURT.

LOST'S TV GUIDE COVER SHOOT.

REESE WITHERSPOON TO COMBAT...STUPID NEW LOHAN REALITY SERIES (BAD MOM DINA, BAD. NO REESE DOLLARS 4U!)

7 OF 9 PROCREATES AND AMERICAN-AFRICAN ACTRESS, KERRY WASHINGTON HONORED.

ONION NEWS-FCC "CLAIMS" ONLY ALYSON HANNIGAN CAN GO NUDE IN PRIME-TIME

PLAYER HATERS-
THAT A-HOLE GUY...THAT USED TO BE MARRIED TO EVA LONGORIA (THE FAKE ONE, ON THE SHOW.)

[NEW SEGMENT]
Alleged scumbag actor and Desperate Housewives B- actor, Ricardo Chavira, apparently attacked a customer whom he didn't even know, at video game store at City Walk. The customer was leaving the store, as the thespian thought he was being recognized again. But, the man silently walk past the pretty boy, one time Monk villain.

The ass replied to the non-existent slight- by saying, "Well it it isn't the tooth fairy." The man didn't reply to the statement,except to angrily star back- in the ugly face of simulated, televised evil. Then,the man looked down in sad disgust, at Chavira's daughter, to whom he was teaching institutionalized homophobia.

The man relieved that, while no macho man, was NOT GAY! He didn't even know, who Carlos Solis was? He admitted, like most real men "stopped watching the show regularly after the first" landmark season of middle aged, sex fest soap.

SEMI-PRO TOPS AND AMY ADAMS TRIES FOR A SECOND HIT MOVIE.

ANGELINA JOLIE WANTS FINANCIAL AID SENT TO IRAQ, FOR THE IRAQIS-NOT THE WAR EFFORT.

SARAH MICHELLE GELLAR...NUDE!!!! (FOR REAL...KINDA OF)

THE INSIDER AS A GAME SHOW-CELEBRITY SAYS WITH DAVE HOLMES.

KIRSTIE ALLEY ANGRY-JENNY CRAIG HELPS VALERIE BERTINELLI GET HER FIGURE BACK AND A NEW SYNDICATED TALK SHOW.

CBS will develop the show, for the former One Day at a Timer for a 2009-10 launch fall launch. The early days of the show- will focus on her hit book- Losing It: Gaining My Life Back One Pound at a Time.

It claims to her admitting to be a notorious "slut" and quite frankly a "druggie."

In addition, she will headline a TV movie, True Confessions of a Hollywood Starlet on the Lifetime network and an A & E Biography will be done on her.

LAPD THINKS SAM LUTFI DRUGGED FORMER POP TART, BRITNEY SPEARS

CSI:NY STAR HILL HARPER, IS BARACK OBAMA'S BEST FRIEND.

JAMIE-LYNN SIGLER TAKES ON LAX

JANET JACKSON'S NEW CD & O.C. STAR SLAPPED WITH DUI,

JAMIE LYNN PROVES TO BE SLIGHTLY SMARTER THAN HER BIG SISTER.

OSCAR DISAPPOINTMENT OF THE NIGHT: BUTCH TILDA SWINTON WINS OVER FAVE RUBY DEE.

LILO IS MARILYN (HOPES SHE DOESN'T DIE LIKE HER.)

THE SEMI PRO PREMIERE.

X BOX 360'S GUITAR HERO MARCHES ON.

J. LO HAS TWINS, AS BIG AS HER ASS AND BRANGELINA WORKS.

ROBERT DOWNEY JR. PLAYS ED ROONEY TYPE, OUT TO GET NEWCOMER CHARLIE BARTLETT.

JESSICA SIMPSON'S BLOND AMBITION IS A HUGE HIT...IN EASTERN EUROPE.

RAP REUNION

PINK DIVORCES AND OWEN WILSON READY TO WORK WITH J. ANI

NICOLE KIDMAN TO PLAY LEAKED CIA AGENT IN NEW FLICK.

She'll be Valerie Plame; she was targeted back in 2003 by the Washington Post.

The film is based on Plame autobiography, "Fair Game: My Life as a Spy, My Betrayal by the White House." Politico Joseph Wilson's lady was forced to quit, her 20 year of patriotic service- when she marked, as "an agency operative on weapons of mass destruction."

Director Doug Liman finally gets his chance to work with Nicole Kidman, after going with his combative second choice Angie Jolie (Mr. & Mrs. Smith) after Kidman was forced to drop out, helping her nemesis save her career and love life.

Liman fed MTV News this statement: “I have a really, really insane take on how to tell it. It’s so outrageous." That's because, national security issues ended up censoring much of the book.

HEIDI KLUM WANTS TO HELP BRITNEY SPEARS.

SIN CITY'S CARLA CUGINO

LATE UPDATE-(PERSONAL ISSUES, SORRY.)-UPI'S REBECCA FIELDS

SHAKIRA NEWS

UMA THURMAN'S NEW MOVIE

MUSICIAN 50 CENT HOSTS NAKED PING PONG TOURNEY.

RAPPER DR. DRE WANTS THE POLICE HELPS AND A STONE TEMPLE PILOTS REUNION.

STRIKEWATCH ENDS!! WRITERS BACK AT WORK- WITH NEW MEDIA DEAL.ALSO, PARIS HILTON'S BROTHER PROVES THAT DUI IS A FAMILY CURSE.

KANYE WEST,TINA TURNER AND BEYONCE AT THE GRAMMYS

MEL GIBSON SCREWS OVER WRITER AND BRITNEY SPEARS DOES SOMETHING POSITIVE AND SELFLESS.

KATE WALSH THINKS "DOGS RULE!!"

STRIKEWATCH FOR WRITERS MAYBE COMING TO AN END.

NIP/TUCK WITH VICTORIA SECRET MODELS

MARY JANE IN REHAB AND KANYE WEST HONORS HIS MOM.

BRITNEY SPEARS ON THE LOOSE AGAIN. CAN SHE LOSE THE PAPS AND GET HER MONEY BACK?

IT'S OFFICAL! HEATH LEDGER DIES OF ACCIDENTAL DRUG OVERDOSE

"BRING IT ON!" LENNY KRAVITZ AND SHERYL CROWE ARE BACK.

J. LO TO HAVE TWINS AND SEX...CITY STAR KRISTEN DAVIS, CARES ABOUT AFRICA.

BRANGELINA HITS THE SANTA BARBARA FILM FEST.

ROBERT DENIRO IS FOR BARACK OBAMA AND SEAN COMBS ACTS AGAIN.

IS AMERICAN IDOL JUDGE PAULA ABDUL BACK, AFTER SUPERBOWL REDUX?

GABRIELLE LIVES! RENEE 'O CONNER SUPPORTS WRITERS IN BURBANK

BRITNEY'S EVIL PARENTS GRAB CONTROL OF HER FORTUNE,DUE TO HER "ILLNESS."

MILEY CYRUS: BOX OFFICE QUEEN AND BRITNEY SPEARS EXTENDS HER "STAY" AT A NUT HOUSE.

WESLEY SNIPES: INNOCENT...OF TAX FREAUD FELONIES!
-TAX FREAUD MISDEMEANORS, ANOTHER STORY.

The Blade:Trinty star had been aquitted of all major charges. Still, he was found guilty of failing to file his taxes, on three MISDEMEANOR counts. He could still face 3 years in a Club Fed facility. He also beat-three other lesser charges- against the currently, conservative government.He took the IRS for millions of dollars.

The thespian was quoted on People.com: "I'm feeling great – a little confused, but great." On possible prison time,"I don't know. It's nice to be out here with you right now. We live in the moment."

Snipes continues: "Of course you would be nervous. You're on trial. Anybody
would have a certain amount of anxiety about that. But I have a great
deal of faith in the Most High and the Good Lord and the truth shall
set you free. So, I'm looking forward to being free, going back to
what I do best."

The New Jack City kingpin's latest picture is called Gallowwalker, he filmed this in Africa- near Namibia.

GEORGE CLOONEY: PEACE WARRIOR AND JESSICA ALBA HAS...THE EYE!

BRITTANY MURPHY AT SUNDANCE

MONTEL WILLIAMS IS STILL ON THE AIR? PLUS, SPEARS BACK IN A MENTAL WARD.

EVA L.-PARKER'S NEW FLICK AND GWEN STAFANI WITH CHILD AGAIN.

BRITNEY SPEARS TO SEE SHRINK.

SAG AWARDS, HAYDEN PANETTIERE AND SPARTANS KILL AT THE BOX OFFICE.

AWESOME, CHILLIN' WITH BARTOWSKI.

AMY WINEHOUSE FINALLY SAYS YES!YES!YES! TO REHAB.